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Episode 145

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Episode Description

In today’s society, people are often judged by their appearance, gender and how they act. If you don’t have the skills and confidence to be your own boss, there is a potential for people and clients to walk all over you. 

Our next guest, Carmelle Jean-Francois, knows how to take charge and boss up. Carmelle is a motivational speaker, fitness enthusiast, and Founder and CEO of cFIT Coaching. She has built a strong foundation through her certifications as a NASM Personal Trainer, a certified Spinning Instructor, a Medical Exercise Specialist, a Pre and Post Natal Exercise Specialist, and a Beachbody Coach. Carmelle’s most recent projects include her newly published blog, Fit To Motivate, and the release of her upcoming book, Women of Color Who Boss Up: Asian, Latina and African American Women Who Thrive and Take Charge of Their Destiny.

Bob delves deep into Carmelle’s relationship with money as they discuss:

[1:40] Money and emotions are always a work in progress.
[2:57] Being bold and putting yourself out there.
[6:37] Challenging the female boss stereotypes.
[12:48] “The switch came when I realized that they don’t know my value.”
[16:47] From poverty to possibility.
[25:46] Becoming your richest self. 

What does fit look like to you? cFIT Coaching provides a safe, encouraging, and supportive virtual community, educating individuals on achieving and sustaining their personal health, fitness, and nutritional goals.

Connect with Carmelle:

Website: https://cfitcoaching.com/
Women Of Color Who Boss Up Book: https://cfitcoaching.com/boss-up-book/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/icyourfit
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cfitcoaching/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/carmelle-jean-francois-b956321b3/

When In Doubt, Ask Sharifah Hardie

Episode Transcription

Click to Read Full Transcript

Bob Wheeler: [00:00:00] Welcome to another episode of money you should ask where everyone has something they can teach you. I’m your host, Bob Wheeler. And in this episode, we’re going to explore a question. Examine converse, dig, deep, exposed, laugh, and cry about the money, beliefs, money blocks, and the life challenges of our next guest. Turn up the volume, listen, learn and learn.  

Born and raised in Queens, New York, our next guest is Carmelle Jean-Francois, a motivational speaker, and the founder and CEO of cFIT Coaching LLC. She’s a fitness enthusiast who has built a strong foundation through her many certifications, such as NASM, personal trainer, medical exercise specialist, pre and postnatal exercise specialist and a beach body coach. 

Carmelle’s most recent projects include her newly published blog, Fit to Motivate and the release of her book, Women of Color Who Boss Up. Carmelle. It’s so awesome to have you today. 

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:00:52] I’m so excited to be here Bob. I want to talk about money.  

Bob Wheeler: [00:00:57] Let’s talk about money. So here’s the thing. We are going to talk about money and we’re going to start off with, and I told you this ahead of time I loved your email when you reached out to me and I loved it for a lot of reasons. 

And I, so, and so I just want to talk about your email. Cause it’s a great place to start, right? So, you reached out to me and you said, “Hey, listen, I’d love to be on your show, even though it probably will work out better for me than you.” Yeah. Right. So, you know, being humble there, but being bold, hey, this is what I want to do. 

So I love, people out there, be bold. Be bold, right. You don’t have to be obnoxious, but you can be bold. And, and and so you, and you said, listen, I like my emotion, my emotions with money is still a work in progress. Me too! Right.  

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:01:39] It’s comforting to know.  

Bob Wheeler: [00:01:40] It’s always a work in progress. Yeah. I mean, I wish that we could all figure it out. 

And never have to look at it again. Unfortunately, money is one of those relationships, like most relationships where it’s a lifelong journey. And so I really appreciate that. You’re like, I’m still on the journey. Yeah. And so am I, so is that so awesome. And you talk about, you know, you’ve come a long way, you’re in the construction field where you have to be a boss bitch to get paid. 

So I really want to explore that mindset of being a boss bitch. And you know, you’re, you’re doing fitness stuff where people are skeptical to pay, right? It’s like, what are you going to really do for me? I want to be fit, but I don’t want to pay you to do it. I’m like, I don’t want to pay you your value. And so here’s the other thing that I loved is that you know, you want to help women to be their best, to be their strongest. 

And now you’re ready to be the richest version of yourself. Right. And so what that says to me is it’s not that you, and we can talk about what rich is. Just like you talk about what motive, you know, what fit looks like for everybody’s different. Everybody’s going to have a different version of fit and everybody’s going to have a different version of riches.  

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:02:56] Correct.  

Bob Wheeler: [00:02:57] And, and so really what I love. And then you ended the email with saying, listen, I’d love, I hope to hear from you. But if I don’t please send me lots of good money karma. Right. And so, again, what I love about this is you’re bold. You’re out there saying I’m going to put myself out there. 

I want to help women. I want to help women of color. I want to help people be the best version of themselves. And there’s a humility there that it’s not like, look, I know everything. I’ve got it all figured out. It’s like, join me on the journey. It feels like an invitation. And so I’m so happy to have you here. 

So tell me what, like, so when you wrote that email was any of that true? What I just said, like did I,  

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:03:36] It’s so interesting. Everything about it was true. I was really trying to, I’m trying to get myself out there, but every email that I sent to every potential interviewer or podcast host, I try to be my sincerest self. 

So. they can see that, okay, she’s she wants to promote herself, but she might find value in whatever it is that they have to offer as well. And so when I saw your, your money podcast, I grew extremely interested because money, like I said, is still something that I’m trying to figure out. And it, I love the analogy you made, where. 

I tell my clients, what, what is your version of fit? What does fit look like to you? And you just made the analogy and I’ve never thought of it in that term. It’s the same thing. Well, what does rich look like to you? Carmelle? And I remember being younger and saying, “oh, I don’t want to be rich. I just want to be comfortable.” 

And then there came a certain point in my life. I said, “fuck comfortable. I want to be rich.” Want to be able to purchase anything I want to purchase and not have to, “do I have enough in the account.”  

Bob Wheeler: [00:04:43] Right.  

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:04:44] And I think everybody pretty much wants that. Right. But some people do settle and think that maybe it’s not for them. 

And I know. It’s for me, like I’m too vain. I’m too extra. I love fashion too much to be able to say, I want to be comfortable. No, no, no. That’s not it anymore. 

Bob Wheeler: [00:05:05] I want to feel great. 

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:05:07] There is some, I want to feel great, and I want to look like I feel great. And yes. I know there’s and, and money just like physical fitness is, there’s a spirituality side to it as well. 

And, and what does rich look like to you? Wealth and riches doesn’t always have to be gold and diamonds, right? It could be the spiritual side of you. It could be your wealth in friendship, your wealth in resources. And I understand that. And I respect that and I’ve even read places for a long time. I grew up Catholic and so we were taught, can’t love money. 

Right because it’s not, it’s riches. You can’t love the material, but Jesus and him, he was wealthy and not so much monetarily, but he had wealth of, of, of, of friends of followers. He walked the earth and he had wisdom and spirituality. So I wasn’t prepared to bring Jesus into it. 

Bob Wheeler: [00:06:07] That’s all right. I’ll just say Jesus saves. So that’s good. Right? Where we’re talking money. That’s good.  

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:06:14] Yes. Yeah. So being bold is something that I’ve only recently truly learned how to do and how to step up. To step up and actually own what I’ve been able to accomplish and what I haven’t been able to accomplish. 

And being that boss bitch in order for me to get what I know I deserve.  

Bob Wheeler: [00:06:37] Absolutely. And let me ask you this. What is a boss bitch? And. Like, what are the pros and cons, because for some people there may be a negative connotation especially being a woman of color. Oh, she’s going to be bossy. She’s going to be loud. 

Right? You have to fight some stereotypes.  

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:06:56] Yeah. So, Bob, I feel fortunate in that I do own my own company. I I’m what they call a filing representative or an expediter. My clients include architects and engineers and contractors and plumbers. So I work in a very male dominated industry. And like I was saying, I’m very blessed to own my own company. 

Then I can pretty much choose who I want to work with and people who want, or don’t want to work with me can choose me or not. I remember. I remember I went through, my hair used to be straight, and I went through this whole process where I let my natural kinky curls come out and a woman, a black woman, a woman of color. 

She approached me. So Carmelle, I meant to tell you, when you go through this process, you will lose some clients because not everybody wants to see your kinky afro. And I remember saying, “f#%k em.” If they don’t want to work with me, they don’t want to work with me and I don’t have to work with them. I’ll find plenty of people who do. 

Now. I know upon seeing me, people see me in a certain way, when they hear that I own my own business, their eyebrows raise, why? When they see come to my office and they see that I have a nice storefront as opposed to a basement office in New York city. The eyebrows raise,, why? I can speculate and I can say it’s because I am a woman of color, I’m a black woman, or I can say because I’m a woman or because they’re just easily impressed. 

I don’t take the time to try to figure it out and I don’t challenge people. I let them take me as I come and I take people as they come, because I also want to have the, I will also want to give them the benefit of the doubt that their intentions are, are pure and true. Some people are ignorant and curious, and I can’t fault them for maybe not knowing what they don’t know. 

And so in that regard, I just try to give everybody the benefit of the doubt. If you want to work with me, let’s work together. However, back to your question, what does being a boss bitch mean? I’ve been in this business 11 years. And for a long time, I was thinking, why aren’t we getting paid what I feel like we should be getting paid? 

Why am I not driving my BMW or  my Mercedes yet? I, we, our office of five women of color. And not that, that has anything to do with anything. It’s just recently I’ve realized that. That’s a big deal. And before that, I just took, it, took it for granted, but that’s a big deal. And for me to be able to say it and own up to it after 11 years in business. 

And I’m proud of that. But for a long time I was under the impression that our clients don’t want to pay us because we are an office of women. Like we are all women here and it didn’t, it’s not, I, that wasn’t my intention to hire only women. It just so happens that everybody that came to the, through  the door, maybe I related to them differently. 

And everybody that came through the door and we just employed, they happen to be women and they happen to be women of color. And for a long time, I’m thinking they don’t want to pay us. “Oh, how cute those there, those girls, what does it, what is the invoice say? Oh, that’s so cute. And let’s just not pay them. 

So I was convinced. So that… my horns, like I was growing horns. Now, if somebody comes to me and say, “Hey, can you do better on this invoice? Absolutely not. I cannot do better all. Can you do better about the pricing? How much you charging for your permit to, for your services? No, you’re just going to have to go someplace else.” And guess what, Bob, they didn’t go someplace else. 

Many of them tried to leave and came back and said, “you know what? You guys, you guys do good work.” I know we do good work. Good work comes out of my office. And I’m proud to say that. And so yes, that, that was one way of being a boss bitch. Another way is, because I’m just, so I have a very friendly, courteous disposition about myself. 

Like I said, I like to give people the benefit of the doubt. And when I became a boss, I wanted to be my employees friends. Can’t do that. I can’t do that. I can’t be my employees friends, because they’re going to treat me like a friend when it comes time “oh, listen, I’m going to be late for work. Something came up. 

I was drinking last night.” No. So then I had to learn to kind of like, “no, that’s unacceptable.” So that was, that’s another way of me bossing up, becoming that boss bitch. And my sister says, “oh, that has such a negative connotation.” She does not like the way the term boss bitch sounds. But in actuality, I feel like women feel in general that they have to be. 

A woman and dainty and nice and the portrayal on TV is as soon as a woman shows that she has some balls to all of a sudden classified as some bitch and nobody can stand her. And she’s the boss from hell. But it’s for a reason, I think because everybody looks at a woman as so dainty, cute, and she has to kind of assert herself extra than a man normally would. 

Because otherwise she won’t be taken as seriously. And I’m not going to forget the fact that I am a woman. So sometimes the emotions do come into play. So I have to play the bitch role even more to make up for the fact that I cried last week. 

Bob Wheeler: [00:12:24] I love, I love that. I love that, but let me ask you this, how did you find it within yourself to value yourself? Right? Was that always there when you said, “no, I’m not going to change the bill? No. That’s, we’re giving you value.” How did you, like sometimes people don’t intrinsically know that they’re bringing value and they doubt themselves. 

 How did you make that switch or was it always there?  

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:12:48] I always knew I had value. I always knew I projected it. I always knew I gave value. The switch came when I realized that they don’t know it. They don’t, they don’t know it. I’m just another person off the street. Black, white male, female, I’m just another person off the street. 

And for all they know, I could be trying to swindle them out of their money. So that switch came in me realizing, Hey, just because I’m sweet doesn’t mean that everybody’s going to know that. I’m sweet. So I had to kinda like assert myself. And now if I can’t, but pretty much, I just have to show you. And in order to show you, the smile has to be removed and I have to show you, listen, this is what I bring to the table. 

And as soon as you feel comfortable with the fact that I am bringing value to the table, I could let my guard down a little bit. And now you can see a little bit more of the true Carmelle. 

Bob Wheeler: [00:13:50] I love that. I love that. And I think it’s so important. I think it’s so important that you realized I have value. They just don’t know it. 

I need to inform them. So I really appreciate that distinction. Now you mentioned you have a sister you grew up Catholic, so I’m going to make an assumption that you have. A few siblings or just you and your sister?  

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:14:12] It’s me and my twin and an older brother.  

Bob Wheeler: [00:14:15] Okay. Three. Oh my goodness. There were five in my family, so it was assumed we were Catholic. 

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:14:23] I get it.  

Bob Wheeler: [00:14:24] We just liked to hang out with the Catholics because they drank more. 

What was it like growing up with a twin and with a brother? Were your parents, did you grow up in a two-parent household and were you taught about money and self value, early on? 

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:14:40] We were taught about money, but in a very the money’s not there kind of way. My parents, my father was a very hardworking man. 

He was an entrepreneur. He owned two taxi cab medallions during his career, but we never really saw him at home. He was a New York city, yellow cab driver. All day! And he worked hard, but between him and my mother who worked as a cleaning lady to business the business buildings, and then later on as an insurance clerk, when she got her certifications, cause she stayed educating herself. 

They put us through Catholic school from kindergarten all the way through 12th grade. And because of that, the money was never there. They spent all the money on our education. So my mom was always counting her dollars and pennies. Dad, dad wasn’t really around much, so I didn’t really see how he handled money, but Mom, money was always an issue and not so much as she made us feel like we were poor. 

She just made us aware that money was always an issue. And then, so she would teach us about savings, but what she taught us about savings was you have to put your money in the savings account. Now we all know, that’s not savings that’s pennies on the…  I don’t even want to say dollar. It’s just, oh, it’s just not true savings. 

And it will never bring you true wealth, but that’s all she knew. Right? So she could only teach us what she knew. Now. I didn’t understand my father’s business. All I knew is that he was never home. And only much later that I realized that him owning two cab medallions was a big, big deal. And but I didn’t see him handling money that well either. 

I don’t have that much recollection of how he handled money, but I know in our family money was just not always there for us to buy the latest brand of sneakers like all the other kids had or the latest outfits like the other kids had. And we never had that. So we always grew up thinking, there was a cap to the money that we can get. 

And we always have to save, even if it’s a penny here and a penny there.  

Bob Wheeler: [00:16:57] Do you have any monumental memories or something when you were a kid with Mom or Dad where you made a decision about money early on or that, oh my God. Like anything that happened with one of your parents?  

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:17:14] Yeah. I remember something with my dad. I was, I want to say that I was, I had already graduated college, so I was a young adult, both my parents immigrated to the United States. I am Haitian American. They’re both from Haiti. They came here, they started a family here. So I am first-generation me and my, my brother and my sister first generation Haitian, Haitian American rather. 

Sorry. My father, when they looked at me, he said, “I don’t understand.” “What Dad?” “I don’t understand why you and your siblings are not doing better.” “What do you mean?” “You guys are Americans?” He says to me, “I don’t understand why you’re not making more money. You were born here. I thought that you being born here in America.” 

would just be super stars, like making all kinds of money, being all kinds of crazy amounts of success.” And that, it hit me. He wasn’t trying to hurt my feelings. He wasn’t trying to, to degrade us in any way. He just didn’t understand. And, and I went through a revelation, Bob, I feel like. The immigrants, people who come here to America, they they’re here to, to make their lives better for themselves and their families. 

They work harder because they have to. They’re not Americans. They have to prove themselves. They have to, and the work ethic is different. Right. I feel like I can say as an American, that a lot of us are kind of on the lazy side because there is a certain passion we hold, “I am American.” I don’t have to speak anybody 

else’s language. Everybody speaks my language. When I traveled, they’re going to speak my language anyway. So why should I? And it’s the same attitude with being, being an American. It holds so much weight all over the globe. So I feel like we definitely adapted to that American way in that regard because don’t get me wrong. 

I understand and I know there are tons of very successful and rich Americans. However, I feel like my, the way my father viewed us being being Haitian and coming here to provide a better life for his family. He didn’t, he thought that I should have been a doctor or a lawyer raking in the dough. That really kind of made me take a look and say, “well, why am I not doing better?” 

And, and I really feel a lot of it is rooted in my ideas and concepts of money. Money was something that I was reaching for as a goal. I feel like  the universe, God, every or any, any type of way you want to look at, it would have really stepped things in motion for me in that regard. I don’t want to sound like I’m blaming outside forces. 

Not at all. I’m just saying that I didn’t, I didn’tlook at the relationship between money and how successful I was at that point in time. Granted, I was a young adult, still very young, but not really putting my goals up in the forefront as far as, yeah. Let’s make some money. Again, I mentioned to you earlier, I was like, “oh, I want to be comfortable.” 

Not.. Why? That was the lazy mentality and that it has a lot to do with my own personality in and of itself.Itself. My parents were very hardworking. I got good worth, work ethic from them, but it just wasn’t producing the money like I would like it to have been.  

Bob Wheeler: [00:20:58] And have you as a kid, as a young adult currently, have you made trips back to Haiti? 

Have you seen like where your parents came from and because it’s two different worlds for any immigrant, but you know, Haiti, it has a rich history. It’s also been very poor, but it was, you know, one of the only countries that was independent and, and, you know, got rid of colonialism as best they could. 

Right. There’s like all this history, a mixture of things, but it’s a different world than America. And did you go back there and have you, can you see any significant differences between those two worlds?  

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:21:40] Significant differences, Bob. I was there, I was last there sadly enough about a little bit over 20 years ago. 

That was the last time I was there. I did get a chance to see where my parents grew up and the country’s very, very poor. Very rich in that it’s just beautiful and it’s, it’s, you know, that’s where sugar comes from and things like that. And the history is rich and yes, we are the first black nation to be independent. 

We were the first and because of that, we do hold our head up high, you know and we do walk with a certain pride because we, we we’ve earned it. But it’s very, very poor. And when I, when I did go over there, the second they see me, they know that I’m not one of them. They knew that I didn’t have to open my mouth and say a word. 

They knew I was American. Just the, my clothes, the way I carried myself, etc. And immediately American equals money. I don’t have to tell you. I think everybody who travels understands that the prices go up. And even when I was speaking their language, the children looked at me and they knew that come on, you’re not one of us, you know, you’re, you’re, you’re American. 

And so it’s, and it’s sad to see how poor they are over there. The level of poverty over there and how far my $1 goes. And when I was over there, I felt like I had all the money in the world because of ’em. It’s, it’s just so different. So yes, I hope I answered your question.  

Bob Wheeler: [00:23:14] Yeah, no, absolutely. I think, you know, I am, been fortunate enough to travel a lot and I travel mostly to developing countries because I, I get a profound sense of gratitude for my life and how fortunate. 

And blessed I am because my first trip I was a bit of that American, you know, what do you mean? You’re not going to speak English for me. What do you mean? You’re not going to work in us dollars for me, I’m American, right? There is this entitlement that I have worked very hard to get rid of. It still pops up its ugly little head. 

And so, you know, but one of the things that I have discovered in a lot of these countries is there is extreme poverty, and there is extreme gratitude. There is extreme ability to live and have joy and to dance and to sing and to experience community that I think that that gets lost sometimes in the U S. 

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:24:13] Yes. I agree. 100%. I remember the nights the nights in Haiti that we spent, like you could hear the music in the area. You can, you can hear everybody’s up. Right. And you hear the crickets and you see the laughter and you hear the talking and there is a an amazing sense of community. That over here, we would have to go to the local park to hear, we can still hear it, but it’s at the local park, but this was amongst community, not just family and friends. 

This was going over to the next town. They don’t even have phones per se, going over to the next town and everybody knows everybody else, or they know somebody that knows somebody else. This is one night when the electricity stopped working and everybody in the house, they must’ve been like 20 people in the house. 

It was these houses, a big in Haiti. Right. And we all ended up on the balcony. To sleep outside that night because it was too hot inside. The electricity I had given out. That means there was no air conditioning and it was such a memorable evening. Cause where can I do that in New York without getting robbed, Bob? 

It was very rich and it was such a good time and it was so simple and it was just beautiful that we could even have that experience. And we slept outside on the balcony with hearing the crickets and even, even some of the traffic and the distance and other people. It was nice.  

Bob Wheeler: [00:25:46] That is so awesome. Yeah. Those are the moments that we remember, right. It’s it’s, that’s the kind of stuff that I think are, are our experiences that are rich. So I’m going to ask you this question, and then I know we have to jump to our, our, our, our fast five, but what is one thing that you you know, we talked about, you know, you’re ready to be your richest self. 

Like, what are, what’s the one thing that you are still working towards that hasn’t yet come to fruition, but that like, it’s gonna happen.  

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:26:17] I think it would be my financial wealth cause I’ve been focused on it. I, for quite a while I feel. I read the money book by, the guru, the motivational speaker.  

Bob Wheeler: [00:26:29] Tony Robbins. 

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:26:30] Yes. Thank you for that. Yes. I read his book, Think and Grow Rich and all these books in preparation of. I’ve also tried to pay attention to the stocks and everybody that I hear that talks a little bit about money and saving everybody that I know that’s a little bit on the, that have figured it out for themselves. 

Even some architects I try to get… sometimes I’m ashamed. Bob. But the fact that I haven’t figured it out and I know it’s most people, but sometimes it shames me because I, I feel like I have friends who have, who, who have more than me. And I’m like, oh my God, why can’t I figure it out for myself? So everybody who I do, like very discreetly, I try to figure out, well, what are you doing? 

I try to pay attention, try to hear what they’re saying. Where their money is. How they invoice. How they receive money and things like that. And I think that’s, that’s helped me gather little bits of information here and there. So I feel like it’s going to happen. I’m still, I’m still learning and I still have big dreams and I think they will both come together. 

And happen  for me sooner than later.  

Bob Wheeler: [00:27:45] Absolutely. I think it’s already happening. So it’s already in motion. It’s in motion. It’s in motion. So I’m going to ask you five questions, fast five. I’m just going to shift a little bit. What’s the boldest thing you’ve ever done?  

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:27:59] The boldest thing I ever done. Oh my God. I can’t think of anything after the call, I’m going to be like, why didn’t I tell him that. Cut my hair on the whim. Somebody said, “Hey, listen, do you want to cut your hair?” And for me to cut my hair was a big deal. Cause all I was trying to do was grow my hair. So I cut it really, really short. 

Bob Wheeler: [00:28:21] That’s pretty bold. What was the last thing you talked? What was the last thing you talked yourself into buying that you were initially on the fence about?  

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:28:28] I want to say jewelry because I, oh, I’m always buying jewelry. I love jewelry. And, and recently with COVID and I’m not going anywhere doing anything. I’m like, my jewelry is just sitting there on the thing, looking at me and I’m looking at it, but I, I I’m always buying jewelry. 

Bob Wheeler: [00:28:46] What’s what’s one thing you wish you had, you had known when you were 18. 

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:28:53] I feel like money really drives everything. It really, I mean, besides love, I think that money enables us to do what we want to do, what we want to do. It gives us, it allows us the freedom. I remember hearing somebody say, listen, money’s not everything but it’s right up there with air. You need it.  

Bob Wheeler: [00:29:17] Absolutely  

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:29:18] Need it. 

Bob Wheeler: [00:29:20] Absolutely. Do you have a budget and do you, if you do, do you stick to it. 

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:29:25] I do have a budget and I’ve been really, really good at sticking to it, but because my mortgage depends on it. If I don’t stick to my mortgage, my budget, mortgage can’t get paid and I’m out of a place to live. Yeah. So I feel like because my mother instilled in us so much to save, I feel like I have come around to sticking within my budget. 

And whenever I go over my budget, for whatever reason, I, I can pull it from other places without digging myself in deeper. So I’m proud to say that.  

Awesome. How greatly would you say your childhood thoughts about money impacted your adult relationship?  

Greatly greatly, greatly. I feel like. That’s where all the blockage comes from. 

I feel like in my mind, I’m always, I’m always trying to save, save, save, save, save, save. And if we even think about the law of attraction and things like that and what the universe has for us, we know that if we’re not allowing it, if I don’t just kind of like release and let go, and just say, I’m going to trust that I can invest in this  

and it’s going to come back to me, tenfold, or I can give to charity and it’s going to come back to me tenfold, or if I could give and just release myself from feeling that I just, oh my goodness, will I even be able to make mortgage? Then I feel like I would be much more free-er, less, so much less tense about money. 

And I know a lot of that, the vibration that I put into money and my thoughts on money really hinder me and I constantly think about it and try to to, “Carmelle just, just release, it’s going to come back. All it is it’s money and there are worse things.” So, yeah, so that it has deeply impacted my adult relationship with money, but I’m working on it. 

Bob Wheeler: [00:31:18] Absolutely. That’s what we’re all doing. We’re all unpacking the baggage that intentionally or unintentionally our parents and our grandparents gave us. So we’re at our M and M moment, our sweet spot, our money and motivation. Is there a practical, financial tip or a piece of wealth wisdom that you use that you could share with our listeners? 

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:31:36] Well, after saying all that stuff, I’m not sure if your listeners would even want to hear it. 

Yeah, but recently I was talking to a financial advisor and she mentioned something about these these apps like Stash and things like that, that kind of take a little bit 50 cents here, 50 cents there and save it and invest it for you in different stock markets. There were an app and it seems innocent enough. 

So I enrolled into, and they take dollars and cents here and there. And recently somebody, it came up that I needed extra cash for something. And I was just looking into my different finances and found that in one of these apps, I had already saved $4,000. Now that was a lot, that’s a lot for me, but I, for, for, for people who are having trouble saving here and there, you enroll in one of these apps and you kind of forget about it, they’re investing your money for you because it’s going into the stocks. 

And before you know, it. You have a little bit $4,000 is not a lot for a lot of people, but $4,000 is $4,000 regardless. So that would be something that I would. That’d be something that I would offer to somebody look into the different types of investments that you can dive into, without having to feel like it’s going to break your break, your bank, or without even having to feel like, “oh, did I make the right decision?” 

Because I don’t know anything about, I don’t know much about Bitcoins or that other new one that’s coming out, that, that people are really starting to look into. Maybe I would do myself a favor by learning about that, but I don’t know. Th the, the saving here and there, and maybe even having a company invest in stocks for you. 

I feel like it’s a smart idea because that’s where people make their wealth, whether they’re telling you or not, they’re their money is someplace working for them.  

Bob Wheeler: [00:33:43] I think that’s great. I always tell people to, yeah, do little bits here and there. It does add up. And 4,000 is 4,000 bucks. And if somebody handed  to me 4,000 bucks, I’m not going to say no, I’m going to take it. 

So, you know what? I really, so I just, Carmelle, what I, what I really appreciate is that what I’ve heard from you is this curiosity. Reading the books, doing the prep work. Not beating yourself up that you haven’t, become that American, that immediately became a doctor in billions of dollars, started pouring in which I have a few doctor clients. 

They’re not all making millions of dollars, but I appreciate that there’s a curiosity. There’s a, you know, there’s this curiosity that you’re being intentional, that you do budget. That you, you know, even if it’s a little bit, even if it’s some pennies and some dollars that you’re doing things that are working in service of you, so that later on you don’t have to be working so hard for it. 

You can just let the money be doing its own thing and it’s on its timetable, whatever that might be. And that you’re willing to be bold and put yourself out there and let people know. That you have value, which you already know, but you’re letting other people know, Hey, guess what? I know that. And I just wanted to let you know that too, so that we’re all on the same page. 

I love that perspective. And I just appreciate that you’re continuing to put yourself out there that you’re interested in empowering other women, women of color. To really make a difference and to have an impact as well as to continue on your journey of financial literacy and financial understanding and financial growth. 

So I really appreciate all that you brought and where can people find you on social media? Where can they find you online? Where can they get your book? And, tell us all that.  

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:35:27] Okay. So my, everything, you’ll find under my website, cfitcoaching.com. That’s C ,C the letter C, fit coaching dot com. I’m on Instagram. 

That’s where I I spend a lot of time, cfitcoaching, one word and everything that I’m doing will be on my website though. That would be my fitness virtual classes. That would be my support group for fitness. That would be my book. You can find it there too. My book is on sale.  $19.97. Go buy it. I’m really, really, I’m really proud of it. Excited about it. That I was able to collaborate with 15 other amazing women of color. 

So everything that I’m doing can be found on my website and I would love if your listeners jump  on there and leave me your email address and I have a free gift for all your listeners.  

Bob Wheeler: [00:36:14] Awesome. Well, we will certainly put that up and let people find you and find your book. So thank you.  

And I want to say to our listeners, please, don’t forget to share the love. Like, follow, &  share on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. Search for Money You Should Ask, all one word. 

Follow this podcast on your favorite podcast player, or visit Spotify and search for Money You Should Ask or click on the link in the description. 

 If you’re watching this episode on YouTube, don’t forget to like, comment and subscribe. 

 For more tips tools, or to learn how to have a healthy relationship with money, visit themoneynerve.com. That’s nerve, not nerd.  

Anyway, Carmelle, it’s been awesome having you. Thank you so much for joining us today.  

Carmelle Jean-Francois: [00:36:48] Oh, it has been a pleasure. Thank you. And thank you for challenging me on some of your questions.  

Bob Wheeler: [00:36:53] Absolutely. 

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