Stuck In the Past? Claudia Monacelli

[00:00:00] Bob Wheeler: Welcome to another episode of Money You Should Ask, where everyone has something they can teach you. I’m your host, Bob Wheeler. In this episode, we are going to explore why we do? What we do when it comes to money as a CPA for the past 30 years, wait, let me say 25 because that makes me sound younger.

I have seen it all when it comes to money and emotions. And if you think I’m talking about my clients, I’m not. I’m talking about myself. My relationship with money has been and sometimes still is an emotional roller coaster. Maybe that’s something you’re also familiar with. Good news, you and I are not the only ones. Our next guest is going to share their money beliefs, money blocks and life challenges as well. Buckle your seatbelt and enjoy the ride.

[00:01:06] Bob Wheeler: Our next guest is Claudia Monacelli, who continues to push literary boundaries, finding her voice in different media. She has worked as an interpreter for the US government, a professional conference interpreter for the Italian Senate and House of Representatives, and a professor at the University of Bologna, and the International University of Rome.

Claudia is also a psychic medium, medical intuitive and energy healer, an NLP specialist and a hypnotherapist for past life regression. In addition, she has written and published numerous books, and she works as a voice trainer, teaching others to explore methods to sustain their breath and improve their breathing patterns. Claudia, I’m so excited to have you here today.

[00:01:45] Claudia Monacelli: I’m excited to be here, Bob. And when you were saying well, that I’m thinking, who is that me? Is that me?

[00:01:52] Bob Wheeler: No pressure, no pressure.

[00:01:55] Claudia Monacelli: Thank you for inviting me. It’s a pleasure to be here.

[00:01:58] Bob Wheeler: Absolutely. You know, normally I start off with your childhood and all these things. But I’m fascinated because you’re working on a new book. And I just love the title called ‘The magic of pleasure seeking’, live like you’ve got superpowers.

[00:02:13] Claudia Monacelli: Right.

[00:02:14] Bob Wheeler: So seeking pleasure and having superpowers sounds amazing to me. Can you tell me how you decided to write this book?

[00:02:20] Claudia Monacelli: Well, I’ve come from an academic background, like you say, and so all of my writing, all every single down to the last drop has been academic with the exception of a couple of fun things, right. The last project that I had was a project that I was giving my academic publisher and they said, oh yeah, this is great. Yeah, give it. When can you give it to us? And then I said, NO, that’s enough. I’m going to have fun with it, I want people to read it. It’s going to mean something’s going to have me just enjoying what I write and that’s when I decided to write this the exact same topic.

[00:02:56] Claudia Monacelli: It’s about women. It’s about women today, and how the media represents women, and how women are influenced by the media and how they influence the media. So there’s this reflexive part to the book, but also it’s about archetypes, how women based on archetypal psychology. Alright, let me give you an example. Bob, if I said to you, Bob, you look like a king today, you would know that it was a good thing.

[00:03:26] Bob Wheeler: Right

[00:03:27] Claudia Monacelli: Yeah, right, right, or if I used any kind of image that could be anything like hobo, a bum, or you look like you’re pushing pencils on the corner are some you get the language through this universal significance of archetypes that they are in universal images. And so I wove it into the book that originally was an academic book, because I saw that working with couples and individuals in therapeutic session’s years ago, and I laugh about it, Bob, because when you introduce me, you introduce me with these two hats, two or four hats.

[00:04:04] Claudia Monacelli: And in one of the hats, the one that I’ve worked with my psychic abilities and past life regression, I work with therapy sessions with people who come to me either in couples or alone. And what I found is that it’s fascinating and it goes right to the heart of what the problem is when I work with archetypes with them. So we do an initial, let’s say in the intake, I’ll call it an intake, I use my abilities and give them archetypes that they emerge us in different areas.

[00:04:38] Claudia Monacelli: For example, the umbrella archetype what they wake up as when they were born, they are that how they are in the bedroom and transgression when they transgress what archetype comes out? What archetype comes out when they interact with an emotional partner or romantic partner in a one to one situation and why they come out as in their hobbies, in their passions, what kind of archetype?

[00:05:04] Claudia Monacelli: And it’s so fascinating because especially with the couple, King would really need a queen, or another king, or you’d have to agree with that.

[00:05:15] Bob Wheeler: Yeah

[00:05:15] Claudia Monacelli: But what I have found, which is overarchingly true, through research that I did about was 98 couples, and the most prominent archetype pair was the King and the Maiden, whether they were two males, two females, or a male and a female.

[00:05:35] Claudia Monacelli: And that is not a good couple in the long run, because it King, of course, he will protect the maiden and the maiden needs protection. So for a while they get you know, they’re good. But the maiden wants to learn her challenge is to learn how to stand on her own two feet. The king doesn’t want to help her do that, because then he would not be her protector.

[00:05:58] Bob Wheeler: Right

[00:05:58] Claudia Monacelli: But she does, she does finally get on her own two feet.  And the king is left there scratching his head thinking, what happened to the beautiful maiden?

[00:06:06] Bob Wheeler: Right

[00:06:07] Claudia Monacelli: And so yeah, and she becomes more independent. And that’s difficult, you know. So it’s fascinating. It’s fascinating. And if I could throw in another one, you just turn me off when it’s enough. Another couple, an archetypal couple that really work well is the ladies’ man, and the fun for towel, which I did not expect.

[00:06:28] Claudia Monacelli: Instead, they are both individualistic, they both have their spheres of influence. And when one has difficulty, the other comes in and helps them. And it’s fascinating to watch because they feed on the spotlight from other people. So they’re not hanging on each other. And they walk always on their own two feet. It’s fascinating. It’s fascinating.

[00:06:49] Bob Wheeler: Well, there’s less of a power differential?

[00:06:52] Claudia Monacelli: Bravo, yeah

[00:06:53] Bob Wheeler: In that case right, in the first one. And I think there are a lot of people that want to be taken care of.

[00:06:58] Claudia Monacelli: Of course

[00:06:59] Bob Wheeler: And have somebody come in and protect them. And then they find, well, wait a minute, don’t I get to make my own decisions?

[00:07:05] Claudia Monacelli: Right

[00:07:06] Bob Wheeler: But when you choose that path, it can be limited.

[00:07:09] Claudia Monacelli: Right, it is limited. Yeah, but you see, when you bring this up, and you tell them the description, the King and the maid, I find them laughing, they’re laughing out loud about themselves, and they understand perfectly. So how was the cure? What’s the treatment? What’s the bottom line in the end?

[00:07:25] Claudia Monacelli: Okay, the maiden has to put on chested on the roll as Queen, at least for a night when the King wants to take her out. It’s through those universal images that it becomes fun, it becomes a game and that’s pleasure.

[00:07:39] Bob Wheeler: And it does have to be some fun, right?

[00:07:43] Claudia Monacelli: It does, yeah.

[00:07:44] Bob Wheeler: Now, some of looking at ourselves is not always fun.

[00:07:46] Claudia Monacelli: No, it’s not.

[00:07:47] Bob Wheeler: But I think for me, I say a lot of times the measure is, am I having fun?

[00:07:52] Claudia Monacelli: Yes

[00:07:53] Bob Wheeler: Like, am I enjoying this? Because even though there are some tasks that I don’t enjoy.

[00:07:56] Claudia Monacelli: Right

[00:07:56] Bob Wheeler: I know that ultimately, pleasure and fun, or at the end, if I’m doing it, I don’t want to say right, but what serves me?

[00:08:05] Claudia Monacelli: Yeah, and I mean, it’s true I can say, I tried to imagine this concept, the pleasure differential, the pleasures ingredient, let’s say, doesn’t work with all people in all different cultures, does it work in all different life, you know, the richer, the medium and the lower classes, different classes. And the thing is that it is a perspective that you have. It’s a perspective, it’s a way of looking at things. And I don’t want to use the metaphor of the glass half full and half empty.

[00:08:38] Bob Wheeler: Right

[00:08:39] Claudia Monacelli: But something similar to that, because this is life, we know that life is life, it’s going to be a times can I say that here

[00:08:48] Bob Wheeler: You can say that, you did

[00:08:52] Claudia Monacelli: Or it could be wonderful the next day, and if it’s wonderful the next day, you could be sure that the following might be going down. But once you accept that and embrace that, then you’re okay. It’s just like the archetype. How can I put it? We all have four faces of fear, it is fantastic. It’s like the person a politician who is crazed with the notion of getting power. But he’s not able to and that puts him in a position of lack with respect to his goal, right?

[00:09:39] Bob Wheeler: Right

[00:09:40] Claudia Monacelli: If that politician, male or female is able to cede the spotlight to cede power and stand back and take on, let’s say, a position of invisibility. While someone else has the floor when they have the power. It’s a game it becomes a game.

[00:09:57] Bob Wheeler: Right

[00:09:58] Claudia Monacelli: Of course, there is only one president but he has a cabinet. It’s like something called I’m sure you’ve heard of this game theory. Game theory, something that came out in the 80s, I believe. But game theory in a nutshell means that when you’re in a game situation you’re playing and we will use to people. The idea is not to win, because if you win the game ends.

[00:10:21] Bob Wheeler: Right

[00:10:21] Claudia Monacelli: But if you both are able to give each other some kind of winning sensation, the relationship will continue. And that could be transferred to business to love, you know, and so the idea is, depends on what you want out of it, you know.

[00:10:38] Bob Wheeler: Yeah, absolutely. And so let me ask you this taking you back to childhood? What was the environment that you grew up in, and were you the queen, or even maiden like, what was going on for you growing up, were you an only child? Were your parents supportive of nurturing the creativity, or nurturing the intellect?

[00:10:58] Claudia Monacelli: Well, Bob, first of all, I have to say that what drew me to this podcast was the topic of money. Because money and I know that you know this, but I have to say it for my own good. Money is one of those taboo topics like sex, politics, it really is. And not many people know that. Because you don’t ask people how much money you make, or, you know, what, how much money would you spend on? And where would you draw the line as? And so I’m saying this to introduce my child.

[00:11:29] Bob Wheeler: Oh, great, great.

[00:11:31] Claudia Monacelli: All right. My parents are we’re immigrants. I immigrated to the United States, when I was five months old, literally, I came off a boat, and Ellis Island the whole bit. And so I grew up in, let’s say, in a context where money grew on trees, literally, because it was the 60s. And that time was a time when whatever the American dream was very, very much alive. And although my parents were working two jobs, and sometimes three, and as a child, I didn’t understand that they, you know, the work was taking their attention away from us.

[00:12:09] Claudia Monacelli: I had two sisters, three girls, we were. So growing up was seeing parents work, and then coming home exhausted, and we were just exploring the streets of a city because I grew up in the city. Everything was, everything was possible, you know, you had five cents and you can go to Woolworths, and you can get a Sunday, you can get the small Sunday, but it was delicious. Right.

[00:12:33] Claudia Monacelli: Now, the growing up period was linked to, my parent’s also religious background, and my religious background was Roman Catholics. And we were in a Roman Catholic school, but by far the greatest tree was the days that we because every day, the first hour, eight to nine was church. And it was, it was church. Alright, so if you went to communion, you didn’t have to have breakfast, you had to be, you know, without breakfast.

[00:13:04] Claudia Monacelli: And so we had the money. So we could go to the pastry shop and get a little pastry and go get the communion. And then we had our sweet, you know, for the day. But the interesting part was that if you bought yesterday’s pastries, they cost half, so you could get two. So it wasn’t we as children didn’t have that never felt. I have never, never, never, ever felt that we lived in a poor environment ever, ever.

[00:13:37] Claudia Monacelli: When in reality, I could remember eating my mother’s meatball sandwiches in front of the house watching the fireworks on July the fourth, it coming up in the middle of factories, because we were living in the city. And you know, but then that context completely changed. There was a change suburbs, and you go out from the middle, you know, the city, and then you go to the suburbs.

[00:14:00] Claudia Monacelli: And for me, I thought, oh my god, what is this suburbs business? I mean, where do you go? There’s nobody walking around the streets. What do you do? And that was a complete change. And so then that’s when all of the interpersonal relationships started, the first boyfriend, the first kiss, and it was shifted away from the church. No more going to church in the morning. I tell you going to a public school, it was, that was great.

[00:14:30] Bob Wheeler: That was great. No regret was great.

[00:14:33] Claudia Monacelli: No regret. Oh come on, I was a cheerleader. I was head baton twirler. I mean, the whole thing.

[00:14:39] Bob Wheeler: Of course, I have no doubt, I have no doubt.

[00:14:40] Claudia Monacelli: Mis-popularity. I mean, I just threw myself in.

[00:14:45] Bob Wheeler: Yeah, let me ask you, were you first born? Were you the oldest?

[00:14:48] Claudia Monacelli: No, I was the second. I was the second. I was supposed to be cloud yo, and not the cloud yeah. I was supposed to be a boy.

[00:14:56] Bob Wheeler: Okay. Yeah, that’s interesting because you’re sort of defined some of number two child rolls here.

[00:15:02] Claudia Monacelli: Yeah, yeah, I know. I know, and the interesting part, there’s three and a half years difference between the first child and me. And one year and two months between me and my other sisters. So when we were coming home over on the boat, my mother was pregnant. She was in the cabin the whole time.

[00:15:20] Bob Wheeler: Oh, wow.

[00:15:23] Claudia Monacelli: Even my dad had to change my diapers and feed the other one he had, it was a rough time.

[00:15:27] Bob Wheeler: Oh man, yeah. Well, let me ask you this as a kid, and even in the suburbs, were you aware of your intuitive gifts? Were you more intellectual? Where now are you? And did you feel shame about that? Can you share that with people?

[00:15:42] Claudia Monacelli: It actually started much earlier. And it was in the city, where because we live two blocks from the church, and I often went in the afternoons. And it was there that it happened. I think I was about seven, six or seven I remember. And I remember it happened in church, I would see angels flying, I would see ghosts, I would see people crossing the vestibule, the cross the altar and seeing scenes and listening to them.

[00:16:11] Claudia Monacelli: And I would write poetry to remind me of what I saw. And that’s when it started the strange, the How can I call it trance, like a trance, it was trancelike in nature, where I completely blocked everything out. And people would have to shake me to get me out of it. And that’s when it started. And during the years after that, when I was able not to think of stupid things like the cheerleading squad, or my baton twirling or my boyfriend at the time.

[00:16:40] Claudia Monacelli: I, you know, was in this, but it was always I had to say, linked to some form of spirituality or religion. Even today, if I have to meditate or think hard about something I will go to I’m in Rome. So there’s so many churches where there are no services and just sit. And that’s when I can sort things out. And the psychic nature of the thoughts are what happened to me the experiences were clear to me as I grew up through my college years, through my college years, when I was really deep involved in studying really tough stuff.

[00:17:22] Claudia Monacelli: I found myself with a number of times where I would just faint, I would lose the senses. I was just fainting. So I saw there that the intellectual as you said, it wasn’t more intellectual, the intellectual endeavors were superimposed with the spiritual, because everything. I mean, literally, and I’ll share this with you, I hope you don’t take it the wrong way. I’m a writer, when I write and when it’s very concentrated, and very, very good in inverted commas when I would think the session is great. It’s like a sexual experience for me. It is so good. It is so exciting.

[00:18:01] Claudia Monacelli: And but it’s I don’t have the boundaries between what writing is and what a trance is, or what channeling for someone is, it’s part of who you are. It’s like growing up with four or five different languages, you know?

[00:18:15] Bob Wheeler: Yeah

[00:18:16] Claudia Monacelli: Because it is a language.

[00:18:17] Bob Wheeler: Yeah, absolutely.

[00:18:19] Claudia Monacelli: Like I said, just turn the knob off. I’ll shut up.

[00:18:21] Bob Wheeler: Oh no, not at all. I, look everything we do should be a pleasurable experience. And you could take it to the orgasmic at a certain point, right.

[00:18:30] Claudia Monacelli: Right

[00:18:31] Bob Wheeler: Even just smell a flower.

[00:18:32] Claudia Monacelli: Right, sure, sure.

[00:18:34] Bob Wheeler: Absolutely. Now, are your siblings are you two sisters very similar to you, or are you very three different people?

[00:18:41] Claudia Monacelli: No, we are definitely three different people. My parents were very dark. My sisters are very dark. I was born on April 1^st, and I had red hair. My dad said she’s not mine.

[00:18:52] Bob Wheeler: She is not mine

[00:18:54] Claudia Monacelli: That was being brought in prefer that was the, you know, first joke, but they think everyone thought that I was sort of different. She’s okay, because she’s good. But you know, there’s a wedding, I’ll get everybody up and dance.

[00:19:10] Bob Wheeler: That’s right

[00:19:11] Claudia Monacelli: I just so we’re all different. We are different people. But you know, the idea of money, we mentioned money. It was in my mind, not only because I grew up in a certain context, even to this day, when there are so many there’s been so many economic crises and the pandemic. For me, it’s like they say in Italian, it’s like your nails. You cut your nails, they grow back. They just keep growing back.

[00:19:35] Bob Wheeler: Right

[00:19:36] Claudia Monacelli: You know, and it’s a mindset that you have, because I don’t concentrate on money ever, ever, ever in the sense that when I do something, I don’t care what it will bring me I have to enjoy it because if I don’t enjoy it, the money that I get from it has no value for me at all, which of course I have bills like everyone else, but it’s they will get paid.

[00:19:59] Bob Wheeler: Right

[00:20:00] Claudia Monacelli: You know, they will be paid.

[00:20:02] Bob Wheeler: No, that’s so awesome. And when you trust that, you know, like, it’s all just gonna work out. As you’ve made life choices, it sounds like money is not the deciding factor in something, it’s more about, is this my passion? Is there pleasure in it, and that you trust that the other part comes from it. Were your parents as immigrants, very scarcity mindset, have a scarcity mindset?

[00:20:24] Claudia Monacelli: I see what you mean. Well, it’s difficult to say, because I would not say that my parents said, Because scarcity to me, also is tied in with the teaching that they would give you, for example, for me, and my children, the sky is the limit, you can be that King, you can do whatever, you know, whatever you want.

[00:20:50] Claudia Monacelli: My son applied to NASA, he wanted to be an astronaut, you know, the whole thing. But they were more protective of the continuity. You know, marrying someone who you’ve got to get married, and I wasn’t being you know, I wasn’t getting married. And my mother then finally said to my father, look, women today don’t have to get married.

[00:21:12] Claudia Monacelli: And I thought, I thought, thank God, thank God. But the scarcity note they wanted to achieve, they wanted to achieve a home, their idea was planned all around the family, never to the idea of making much more that was not part of there. My dad was interested in being a professor. But then he became a prisoner of war, and spent eight years in India. So that changed that scenery. And my mother at the time, she was a seamstress for one of the very high fashion houses.

[00:21:51] Claudia Monacelli: And so when my dad came back and left the he escaped, literally, they had a chance because his father was in United States said, come on, let’s go. Let’s just leave, let’s all go. And so my mother said, okay, fine. And so from the high class seamstress, she went working in factories, you know, so it was completely different. But it doesn’t matter, because they had a few they were adventure, some you know, and that way, and they were not children when they did that, you know, that’s so cool.

[00:22:19] Bob Wheeler: That’s so cool. And with your children, do you, did you talk with them about money consciously?

[00:22:26] Claudia Monacelli: Oh, yeah

[00:22:26] Bob Wheeler: Was it more about just leaving?

[00:22:28] Claudia Monacelli: No, no. When my son, my oldest was about 13, 14. And I was thinking, said, you know, Lorenzo is his name. I said, you know, maybe it’s time for you to start doing, you know, something. And my husband was, are you joking? That’s child labor. This kid is only 12. He’s only 13. I said, well, I was, I was an Avon lady. I went door to door at 13. But that was another time that was another place. Right.

[00:22:53] Claudia Monacelli: So my son is seeing these two people with two different mindsets. Within six months, he started giving math lessons was being paid for my visa was the one who wanted to be the astronaut. Yeah, so they have that idea of making money making money because they have to put not a price tag, but give themselves value. It’s not easy, and I have to say it’s not easy when I started my business.

[00:23:20] Claudia Monacelli: And Alright, so here’s this professor who works for an institution who has a standard national paycheck, and that standard, then open a business where I started, you know, clearing houses from negative energy reading cards, past life regression, all of this. And I started to think, oh, my god, how am I going to give price tags on these? And it was easy. It was easy for me because I started thinking, Okay, I’m putting myself in a level.

[00:23:51] Claudia Monacelli: I was doing this activity in a place like YouTube, which as you know, is quite a strange place. It’s not a market. It’s a showcase. But it’s a showcase where it’s always one to many you never know who’s on the other side. And the level, there are many intellects, but there are many street people and you’ve got to spin your language to you know, depends on what you do. You have to spin it for where you want it.

[00:24:18] Claudia Monacelli: And so I was looking around because I had never watched YouTube videos ever. I admit, I almost laughed when I say that, but I didn’t. I never watch people read cards online. And I started seeing people that I liked and who I admired. And I went to go look at their prices and I thought, you know, I said, okay, that’s okay. And then I thought, well, I’m maybe I’m the new kid on the block.

[00:24:41] Claudia Monacelli: So I’ll start lower, but within six months, and I was way over much over that because I had a different way and I had to give my let’s say, my style, had a price. And the interesting part about that is that not only you’re starting but your time has a price. And for me, it’s a matter of time when I do something. If I do something, I can’t do something else, right. And so, if I do something, it’s got to have a price that will give me that hours’ worth of my professionality.

[00:25:16] Claudia Monacelli: You know, or professionalism. So that’s how I spun it. But it was very just like giving grades. When you’re teaching the first time I got, how am I going to give them grades? And then sure, slowly, but surely you gave them.

[00:25:28] Bob Wheeler: You find the way?

[00:25:29] Claudia Monacelli: Yeah, money is a funny thing. You know, it’s not a funny thing. It’s a language of love really. It’s one of the languages of love, for example, many people have touch as their language of love, and others have other things but money is a lot of people like to give gifts, that’s, you have to appreciate that. And for a long time, I used to think, oh, they’re trying to buy my love. I didn’t realize, and that’s their way and that has to be accepted, you know, it’s very interesting.

[00:25:57] Bob Wheeler: Yeah, and both could be true. Somebody could also be trying to buy your love. So you have to be discerning.

[00:26:03] Claudia Monacelli: Yeah, unfortunately

[00:26:04] Bob Wheeler: Where you’re being manipulated and where you’re receiving.

[00:26:07] Claudia Monacelli: Right

[00:26:08] Bob Wheeler: Now, let me ask you this, because we talked about your parents, we talked about your kids. Were there any surprises when you got married, and found out that your husband didn’t actually necessarily share all your same values around money? Were any other surprises, like, all of a sudden, here’s a new person?

[00:26:24] Claudia Monacelli: Oh yeah, and that was the beginning of the end.

[00:26:28] Bob Wheeler: Yeah, yeah

[00:26:29] Claudia Monacelli: Well, it’s a political decision as well. I mean, you go to the supermarket, I don’t like to buy Oreos. I like to buy the imported cookies, because their chocolate is different than, you know, and so we didn’t like that. He’d go shopping, and he pay a certain amount I’d go shopping, and I’d have to hide the receipt. That’s difficult, that’s probably, I guess, sex and money are the two things that either make or break a relationship.

[00:26:58] Bob Wheeler: Yeah, and you need both in marriage.

[00:27:03] Claudia Monacelli: You do, absolutely

[00:27:04] Bob Wheeler: At least to have a pleasurable marriage?

[00:27:08] Claudia Monacelli: Yes, absolutely

[00:27:12] Bob Wheeler: Yeah, well, it’s amazing to me how many couples get married and know nothing about each other’s finances, or financial backgrounds or financial beliefs

[00:27:19] Claudia Monacelli: Right

[00:27:20] Bob Wheeler: And it’s quite a bit of a shocker when you discover you know, it’s almost like sticker price shock. Why did I buy it? Because all of a sudden, you’re having to hide receipts. And then there’s maybe shame or guilt…

[00:27:36] Claudia Monacelli: Yes

[00:27:37] Bob Wheeler: That, okay, I’m either doing it wrong, or in a way that’s not going to be approved. And so if I want to keep the peace, I’m gonna have to hide certain things about me to be able to show up in this relationship.

[00:27:48] Claudia Monacelli: I know, to be fair, I have to link it to the political side, because my ex my wonderful ex, and Father of my children wonderful person. He for many, many years was from the political party from the communist political about the social communist. When that all fell with the wall of Berlin, there was so much disorientation there, and the poor man, like many of his age, and of his class, let’s say, lost that.

[00:28:16] Claudia Monacelli: And let’s say, the woman who went to the supermarket to buy the important stuff came from America, what does she know?

[00:28:22] Bob Wheeler: Right

[00:28:23] Claudia Monacelli: She doesn’t know anything about politics. And so it was a political, you know, and whereas I’m a left wing liberal, I come from the university setting, but they usually are, and we were probably nearly on the same page. It was boiling down to the money, how much you spent, where you spent it, and how you earned it? That’s instead of spinning it in a political way, which is almost impossible. It was actually pen to paper black on white, how you, you know, what comes in what goes out? And where does it go you know?

[00:28:55] Claudia Monacelli: What we used to do? And we always did was get an envelope, put it in the first drawer. And when we you know, before we’re talking before, say we would take our paycheck, say we decided, alright, how much do we want to keep 300, 500? Let’s put it in the envelope. And when it’s over, we’ll go back and put some more in. So that’s how it went. We weren’t not we weren’t a couple who believed in investing.

[00:29:25] Bob Wheeler: Right

[00:29:26] Claudia Monacelli: Because I was in intellect. And he was an intellect who is an architect, you know, in our heads, we can think of that

[00:29:32] Bob Wheeler: Right

[00:29:32] Claudia Monacelli: I can’t, I can’t even spend the time finding somebody to think about that. I get to want to do that, you know, but it’s interesting because, like yourself, I have a podcast and so I interview a lot of people, one woman who was a financial consultant, she said to me, you know, I became a financial consultant, because my mother squandered a million dollars of inheritance in three years. And I lost, you know, the air came out.

[00:29:59] Claudia Monacelli: I didn’t have, I heard my breath I couldn’t breathe. Are you joking? Said, no, and she said, I help people manage their finance. And I said, Well, I can remember her name. And I said, but a lot of people don’t have that mindset. And she said, well, look, if they have, I said, they don’t have that much to invest. She said, well, money, you put money in your wrist, in your hand in the palm of your hand, you close that hand really tight, money will not go out, but no money can come in.

[00:30:32] Claudia Monacelli: So that’s it. That’s the way it is, you know, you’ve got to give it away. So you get it back. It’s just a universal law. It flows. It’s a language, you know.

[00:30:41] Bob Wheeler: Yeah, absolutely. Well, for me, money is an energy and you’ve got to let it go for it to come back. It’s just learning how to let some of it stay.

Yeah, right

[00:30:51] Bob Wheeler: When it’s moving around.

[00:30:53] Claudia Monacelli: Yeah

[00:30:54] Bob Wheeler: And find that balance and make music with it.

[00:30:56] Claudia Monacelli: Yes

[00:30:57] Bob Wheeler: Right, instead of just noise.

[00:30:59] Claudia Monacelli: Yeah, and to tell you the truth to continue with the money. So my ex, we talk on the phone five times a day, he decided all of a sudden, to invest some money, all right? Now, you imagine the person that I explained to you, and he has some money, and his bank convinced him to take some of all these building blocks of money, take some don’t leave it in there, put it somewhere. And so he was convinced it took them six months to convince him. He did it. He didn’t sleep for a week straight after he did it.

[00:31:34] Claudia Monacelli: Oh, I shouldn’t have done that. I shouldn’t have done that. He was sick. He was sick and used to go back to the, you know, it was not part of his being he couldn’t do it. And I said, what are you going to do? He says, but I’m getting old, you know, the idea of being gold, and not having money to help you in your old age. And I said, but you know how much money you have? And I played a game with him.

[00:32:00] Claudia Monacelli: And I said, let’s imagine that your car breaks down every single month. Let’s put $1,000 for your car. It’s an old car, you don’t want to change. And so I went all through the motions. And he was still in. It’s not in the red. What is it in the blue?

[00:32:14] Bob Wheeler: In the positive, in the green.

[00:32:15] Claudia Monacelli: In the positive, in the green. Yeah, yeah

[00:32:16] Bob Wheeler: In the black

[00:32:17] Claudia Monacelli: But even if I showed it to him, and it wasn’t that it was his upbringing, his upbringing and the way he lived when he was a child, that’s I think that’s what it was.

[00:32:30] Bob Wheeler: Yes, absolutely. And I think that’s where a lot of it stems from beliefs, and blocks that we pick up from four or five and six years old, and then carry them to adulthood without getting an update. Right. We don’t update our stories. So we’re somewhat living in the past. Where would you say you still have any challenges around money, if any? Is there something that still catches you off guard, or still?  

[00:32:55] Claudia Monacelli: No, no, I’m always so surprised. I’m always so surprised that I get money somewhere from somewhere. And I’m thinking, wow, that was nice. You know, I never I don’t, I can’t see a really I have to say no, I don’t have that. I’m thinking of the next book, or the next day. What can I do now with all with my energy, what can I do now you know?

[00:33:19] Bob Wheeler: What do you think that your intuitive gifts, the energy healing and all of that helps you to be more trusting than maybe somebody else? Because I mean, you’re really fortunate in that you have left brain, right brain, right?

[00:33:31] Claudia Monacelli: Yeah

[00:33:32] Bob Wheeler: Because the analytical part is going to get you out of trouble. Sometimes when the creatives just being creative, right?

[00:33:37] Claudia Monacelli: All right. Yeah, but I have to admit, alright, I come across as being a Pollyanna type person. I was a victim of fraud just yesterday, it happens at least three or four times a year and, you know, what can you do? I can’t cry about it. It’s done. Forget it, go leave, I will not get a lawyer to sue somebody because that’s not good energy for me. Just turn the page and let’s go. I’ll just take it as one chalk it up to experience I have to. Alright, you know, I mean, if I’m really that low, I’ll just go. You know, my father used to say, I’ll just eat bread and onions.

[00:34:17] Bob Wheeler: Well, it’s an Italian bread, and onion are caramelized. It’s not a bad meal. I just gotta have my daughter.

[00:34:26] Claudia Monacelli: I’ve got to have a little wine to go down.

[00:34:31] Bob Wheeler: Exactly, it’s not so bad. It’s not so bad. What caught it, we’re at our Fast Five.

[00:34:35] Claudia Monacelli: Okay, all right.

[00:34:36] Bob Wheeler: So Fast Five is brought to us by cube money, which is a cash envelope system made easy. It’s real time financial awareness without the hassle of tracking expenses and carrying cash. So it’s a great app where you’re not doing the envelope system with Money in Your Pocket, which I love the envelope system. I don’t know if you’ve ever done that, but it’s, it’s great. So anyway, for folks that are trying to budget cube money is a great app. So Claudia, we’re gonna go and we’re gonna throw them out top of the mind answers.

[00:35:04] Claudia Monacelli: I’m ready.

[00:35:05] Bob Wheeler: Alright, what was the last thing you purchased that was over $100?

[00:35:09] Claudia Monacelli: Well, it was a binoculars, it was binoculars. And because I want to see the stars, and I’m in the city, so you know that I have to really go far.

[00:35:22] Bob Wheeler: You have to really far

[00:35:25] Claudia Monacelli: Binocular, and it was much more.

[00:35:28] Bob Wheeler: And were you happy with that purchase?

[00:35:30] Claudia Monacelli: Yes, I was absolutely happy. It was a toy. For me that was a toy. And usually the money that I spend that is over that amount. I consider toys even if it’s clothing. It has to be something I could play with. You know, mix and match, that’s to be a toy.

[00:35:50] Bob Wheeler: Absolutely, has money ever gotten you in trouble?

[00:35:54] Claudia Monacelli: Oh, yeah. Like, you know, I said the fraud, giving you know, paying a down payment for a house that didn’t exist, you know, yes, yes, I’ve got in trouble.

[00:36:05] Bob Wheeler: Well, has your intuition ever helped you out of financial trouble?

[00:36:10] Claudia Monacelli: Let’s say that I always use my intuition and anything I do. So unfortunately, when it didn’t go well, then I probably didn’t use my intuition very well. I put it badly.

[00:36:25] Bob Wheeler: Yeah, absolutely. When someone less fortunate asks you for money, and you don’t have money to give. What do you say to that person?

[00:36:34] Claudia Monacelli: I’ll be back, yeah.

[00:36:35] Bob Wheeler: Yeah, that’s awesome. When checking out of a store, would you rather go to a cashier or use self-checkout?

[00:36:42] Claudia Monacelli: Yeah. It’s much more fun for me. I like ding, ding…

[00:36:50] Bob Wheeler: You like scanning the items better than they do.

[00:36:52] Claudia Monacelli: Yeah, yeah

[00:36:55] Bob Wheeler: Though, my goodness. Well, that’s five. But there was a question I was gonna ask.

[00:37:00] Claudia Monacelli: You can ask me look anything but my age.

[00:37:06] Bob Wheeler: Alright, last question. I know this is more than five.

[00:37:10] Claudia Monacelli: Okay

[00:37:11] Bob Wheeler: Have you ever lent money to family or friends and regretted it?

[00:37:16] Claudia Monacelli: Yes, once. Yeah, and it wasn’t even a whole lot of money. But it was the person that was you know, it taught me a lesson, let’s say. Yeah, it really taught me a lesson.

[00:37:27] Bob Wheeler: Well, sometimes it’s hard, especially with family to set a boundary or draw a line. Because we love them.

[00:37:35] Claudia Monacelli: Yeah, yeah, yeah

[00:37:36] Bob Wheeler: We feel manipulated sometimes to happen.

[00:37:38] Claudia Monacelli: Al least it’s never happened, never happened in the family. You got a bad deal.

[00:37:44] Bob Wheeler: I got a bad deal. I love it dearly. But they didn’t always play fair.

[00:37:50] Claudia Monacelli: No, I close eyes to family. But it was a friend. It was a person that I had worked with. And yeah, it was a mistake on my, it was enabling. It wasn’t helpful, you know.

[00:38:00] Bob Wheeler: Yeah

[00:38:01] Claudia Monacelli: Enabled them.

[00:38:01] Bob Wheeler: Yeah, absolutely. While we’re at our M&M, sweet spot, or Money and Motivation. Can you give the listeners a practical financial tip or a piece of wealth wisdom that has served you?

[00:38:13] Claudia Monacelli: Yes, think big. Imagine it, visualize it. Visualize your house with an infinity pool out at the rooftop and it will work. You will be, you have to have an infinite mindset. You have to have a big cheer you up to dream very big. Because dreams do come true, they really do.

[00:38:36] Bob Wheeler: Yeah, they do. I love that.

[00:38:39] Claudia Monacelli: Yeah

[00:38:40] Bob Wheeler: Well, Claudia, one of the things that I really loved about this conversation is the lack of blame. Also, I didn’t hear anything about how you were a victim of childhood, or any of these different things, but about really a sense of trusting. And I know you didn’t say this, but it feels like a sense of wonderment or being open to what’s around the corner. And then checking in with your intuition as to whether or not, is this fun or pleasurable? Is this worth my time? And not so much about? Like, how much am I making?

[00:39:11] Claudia Monacelli: Yeah

[00:39:12] Bob Wheeler: And where’s it coming from? But this real trust that in a way, it’s actually quite hopeful. You know, because so many people could be pessimistic, you get scammed three or four times a year. Oh, yeah. It’d be quite bitter. And you’re like, it’s part of the territory. I’m going to live my life. I’m going to keep showing up. And so it’s really great that it’s whether money or whether it’s having your career come to fruition or writing a new book that it’s really about just opening up each chapter as it is being in the present.

[00:39:41] Claudia Monacelli: Yeah, it does get me in hot water. I mean, you do have people take advantage of that trust. And of course, you’ve got to be ready for that. And you really have to even expect it probably and then it’ll it won’t hit below the belt yet.

[00:39:55] Bob Wheeler: But you know, here’s what I like about that though. And I’ve said this about myself sometimes people say I’m too trusting. I’d rather be too trusting and not lose my sense of hope.

[00:40:07] Claudia Monacelli: Yes, yes, of course

[00:40:08] Bob Wheeler: Because otherwise I become a cynic.

[00:40:10] Claudia Monacelli: Oh, God. Yes, I know.

[00:40:11] Bob Wheeler: And I don’t really want to live in that place on a continual basis.

[00:40:16] Claudia Monacelli: Yeah, you’re right. I hear you.

[00:40:18] Bob Wheeler: I love that I’d rather have a couple missteps and not become so jaded. Where can people find you online and social media? Where can people find your book? And I know you’re going to have pre orders at some point for the new book, but where can people learn more?

[00:40:32] Claudia Monacelli: Okay, I have my name Claudia Monacelli, you can find me on YouTube. It’s Claudia Monacelli, and there’s an AKA Crystal Martinez. I have two websites. One is for the psychic of me, that’s crystalmartinez.com. And the other is with my name, the author and the movement and voice coach that I work with and that is claudiamonacelli.com. I have a great Instagram following, which is the magic of pleasure seeking, and that is probably where you can find me best I think, yeah.

[00:41:06] Bob Wheeler: Well, that sounds awesome. And I hope people go and check you out.

[00:41:10] Claudia Monacelli: Oh the book, yeah.

[00:41:11] Bob Wheeler: So that they can check in with their Kings and Queen Archetype and decide how they want to live their lives. It’s been such a pleasure.

[00:41:20] Claudia Monacelli: Me too.

[00:41:21] Bob Wheeler: And so I so appreciate you getting up. Well, it’s actually evening for you. I keep forgetting the time.

[00:41:24] Claudia Monacelli: Oh yeah, it’s evening.

[00:41:26] Bob Wheeler: Yeah, you’re ahead of us.

[00:41:27] Claudia Monacelli: Yeah, we’re ahead of you nine hours. No, no, it’s fine. It’s fine. And it was a pleasure to have this type of you know, with this money, I really do appreciate someone who has the courage to get people to talk about money, or you really need to talk about money because it is a language of love, and you’ve got to spread that around.

[00:41:47] Bob Wheeler: Absolutely. Well, I wish you the best for the rest of the week and future endeavors. And please let us know when your new book comes out so we can actually let everybody know about that.

[00:41:57] Claudia Monacelli: Thank you, Bob. It was a pleasure. Bye, bye.

[00:41:59] Bob Wheeler: Thanks so much.

[00:42:06] CLOSING: We hope you enjoyed this episode. Did you learn something new about your relationship to money today? Maybe you have a friend who has some financial blocks or beliefs that are holding them back. Please share this podcast so they too can get off the roller coaster ride of financial fears and journey towards financial freedom. To learn how to have a healthy relationship with money, visit themoneynerve.com, that’s nerve not nerd. We’ll be back next week with another perspective on ‘money and the emotions that bind us’.